Reflections, One Month In

I have been traveling for just over one month. Depending on the day and the moment, it feels like a lifetime, and it feels like it began just yesterday. Every day brings with it a new adventure, a challenge, and a moment that makes me grateful to be wherever I am. There are times, of course, where I want nothing more than to wake up and find myself at home, in my own bed, with my cats meowing and familiar things surrounding me. But those moments have been few and far between, and I quickly move past them.

The one month mark seems like a good opportunity to share some thoughts and experiences I’ve had at various points. All of these are specific to me, and none of them should be taken as generalizations. Except that’s what I’m doing, of course, so feel free to assume all you want. 🙂

Traveling Solo

While I have encountered other solo travelers, the majority of people I seem to end up spending time with are traveling as couples. Part of this is age (younger solo travelers are probably in hostel dorms) and part of it is location (I’ve been told that solo travelers often stick to Europe or Australia). Being a solo traveler has its ups and downs. I am completely free to do exactly what I want, when I want, and there’s no one else I have to make decisions around. Don’t like your schedule? Change it! Find a restaurant you really like? Go back there three nights in a row! This has been an advantage, since I’m still figuring out exactly what activities and sights I enjoy. I like walking around cities, so I’m putting in a lot of miles (excuse me, kilometers), and saving money on taxis. Someone else might not want to walk as much as I do. But it’s not always great. Some excursions would be much more fun if I was with another person – the elephant camp, for example, I would probably have had a different experience sharing my elephant with a friend instead of a stranger. It’s not a bad way to meet new people, and I’ve been fortunate to only meet people I was able to get along with, but it does require a different sort of mental energy. My introversion has really taken a kick in the teeth over here. The cruise in Ha Long Bay, I ended up picking specifically because people I had just met were going to be there. I’m grateful I did that – had I been on that same boat by myself, I’m not sure I would have had a single conversation, as the other travelers were a group of Australian college kids and a few couples who kept to themselves. Being solo can make the physical act of travel more difficult – there’s no one to watch my bags while I use the restroom or get a snack, I can’t joke with another person about “hope we’re on the right bus!”, and you’re suddenly aware of the fact that there’s no one with you to provide that unnoticed but crucial bit of reassurance that no matter what happens, you’ll figure it out. I haven’t had any problems so far (*fingers crossed*) but it’s something I’ve thought about. But I don’t for a second regret my choice to travel, solo or otherwise. I’ve met incredibly wonderful people who are already friends, I will be connecting with several of them again in future months at various locations, and I will continue to meet new and interesting people.

Being in the Moment

It’s occasionally hard to focus on where you are now, when you’re thinking about the next stop. Part of this is me: I’m a planner, so I like researching and making arrangements. But sometimes, when I’m maybe not enjoying a place as much, I let myself get so distracted by upcoming destinations that I don’t make as much of an effort as I could to enjoy where I am. Kind of ties into my next point…

Maintaining your energy level

Taking a two week vacation can sometimes be the most stressful thing in the world. You plan every minute, make sure you check off every sight on the Lonely Planet tour guide list, and get home more exhausted than when you left. And that’s fine! But for long term travel, it’s not possible. The best tip I got when planning this trip was, remember you aren’t on vacation, you’re living your life. Don’t drain your energy trying to see and do everything. You can’t! I’ve lived in cities for years without seeing all the sights, so how would I ever manage to do it in a few days. If I’m having a good time, and go to sleep thinking ‘today was a good day’, then it was. I do occasionally realize how much I’m not seeing however. One example that will stick with me is in Hanoi, taking a cab to the airport, looking out the back window, and seeing a Ferris wheel, somewhere in the city. Had no idea where it was, hadn’t seen it on any map, etc. Not that I would have gone, but…just interesting to be reminded that even big things can be overlooked.

Towns or Cities

I’ve discovered I prefer the smaller towns to the big cities. It’s fun to see the bigger places, but they are exhausting. Smaller towns, like Hoi An (where I am right now) are much easier for me to relax and recharge in. You can sit and have a coffee, read a book, and just watch the world turn. I’ll be curious to see if this holds true outside of Asia – I can’t say I ever noticed it in the States, but I also wasn’t paying attention. Living somewhere is very different from visiting there.

Scams (or lack thereof)

Despite many warnings beforehand, I have encountered no major scams. The taxis are annoying, but once you understand how it works (in Thailand always insist on a meter, in Vietnam make sure to only use the reputable companies) it’s easy enough. One kid in Hanoi pulled the shoe scam on me (stop me, grab my foot and ‘fix’ my shoe) but I stood my ground and only gave him 10,000 VND (about 50 cents). Do some basic research ahead of time and you’ll be fine. Somewhat related, the locals I have met at hotels and restaurants have been some of the nicest people in the world. Happy to talk with you and answer your questions or give suggestions on what to do tomorrow. One restaurant I went back to a second night gave me a free dessert just to say thank you for coming back (and it wasn’t like they were hurting for business). And I would just like to say that I vastly prefer their approach to tipping. The nicer restaurants will automatically include 10% in your bill, and that’s all you need to do. Everywhere else, just round up to the next bill. It’s not expected at all – I had one waitress come outside after me to ‘return’ the $1 tip I had left for her. You just don’t have to think about it.

Shopping and how I loathe it

Having said all of that, I also hate the cultural approach to shopping (more of a problem in Vietnam). I have never been a fan of high-pressure sales tactics, and here they take it to extremes. I would love to see some of these shop ladies go up against your typical used car salesman – just make sure to bring popcorn. They stand outside their shops, shout at you from across the street, “You come in my store?!” and god forbid you actually express interest in buying something, they’ll have it in a bag and be holding a hand out for money before you know it. I’ve been told stories about how I’m the first customer of the day and a nice person, therefore I must buy something for good luck. One woman practically dragged me down the street, yelling at her competition to get out of the way, when I agreed to take a business card in case I wanted to buy something later. I can’t really handle it – I’ll window shop briefly, but the second they come out and start trying to get me inside, I leave. Of course, most souvenir shops are the same mass-produced crap anyway, but the point still holds. It’s the same with restaurants – don’t expect to be able to look at the menu before deciding. The worst, however, are the guys on motorbikes. Maybe I get this more as a solo traveler, but the routine is constant – point a finger at me, smile, and shout “motorbike?”. I shake my head no. Most of them move on, but frequently, you get a persistent individual who will accompany you for the next block, showing you handwritten notes from previous customers of how good a tour guide they are, explaining how everything is too far to walk (thanks to Google Maps, I know how untrue this is), and so forth. It taxes my patience – I was raised to be polite (thanks mom & dad!) but sometimes there’s no choice but to simply say “no, thank you” and keep walking

To sum up the above two comments, the conclusion I have come to is this: once you are already a guaranteed customer, it’s a wonderful relationship. Until that point, you’re a mark and their sole job is to get you to agree.

Food

I am completely screwed when I get back to the US where fruit and vegetables are bland and expensive. Every guesthouse I’ve stayed in starts the day with a plate of fresh fruit, and it’s always incredibly delicious. You can get a fruit smoothie on any street corner, and the amount of fresh greens on everything makes me herby! (Oof. I’m sorry, that was terrible. I’ll show myself out.) I’m not eating street food as much as I thought I would – after a couple of nights of eating things without really knowing what they are, it loses the appeal. But there’s still plenty of amazing things to be had, and the restaurants are an experience in themselves! Having said that, every couple of weeks, I give my tummy a break and find myself some pizza. Some things just have to be done.

 

Anyway, that’s justa few of the things that come to mind when I think about the past month. It’s been wonderful, it still is wonderful, and I’m looking forward to many more adventures to come. If you’ll let me finish with a sappy comment – I always liked the line at the end of the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie, where Jack Sparrow has gotten his ship back and can go anywhere he wants.

“Bring me that horizon.”